Today I am starting a new series Wellness Wednesday. My hope is to share about various issues regarding wellness whether physical health or mental health. The posts will be more along the lines of encouragement rather than advice. My first topic is Chosen Family.
Family issues are something I have experienced myself having grown up in a family with an alcoholic father and a mother who had mental health issues she never sought help for. What do we do when our biological family has severe problems or even just some problems? What do we do if the situation is toxic? I would always encourage someone to seek counseling of course.
How do we balance what the bible says about honor your father and your mother with a situation like what I grew up in?
Jesus shed light on this when his own earthly family tried to interfere with his ministry in Mark chapter 3.
Then Jesus entered a house, and again a crowd gathered, so that he and his disciples were not even able to eat. When his family heard about this, they went to take charge of him, for they said, “He is out of his mind.”
Imagine the scenario. Jesus our creator who came to earth to be our Savior experienced his mother and his half brothers coming to “take charge of him” thinking he was crazy.
When someone told him his mother and half brothers were outside, Jesus’ response was:
Who are my mother and my brothers?” he asked.
Then he looked at those seated in a circle around him and said, “Here are my mother and my brothers! Whoever does God’s will is my brother and sister and mother.”
Jesus shared that those who do God’s will are his family. This sheds light on something for me that has been helpful. Look to those who are part of God’s family when biological family is a problem.
What do I mean by that? How does this look in my life?
When my biological parents were alive, I did try to share with them, prayed for them, and remembered things like their birthdays. But I did not look to them for guidance, encouragement, or reinforcement.
Important Note- if you have been a victim of any kind of abuse please seek counseling and guidance. If being around those who abused you is harmful, please seek counseling.
When I was younger, I sought out people older than me in church who I respected for those important aspects of life. Now I am older, but I still think of my close friends at church as my chosen family.
Chosen family are those people who we know truly have our best interest in mind, who we can healthy relationships with, and who can encourage us in our lives and faith. Friends can come and go in our lives, but there are some who I have stayed friends with for almost 30 years.
Thank you for reading. God Bless.